Rage Becomes Her

July 16, 2018
In this provocative analysis, journalist and activist Chemaly describes the many reasons women have to be angry. Though early instruction in gender conventions inures girls to objectification and teaches them to swallow their anger, Chemaly writes, the list of things “stressing us out and making us angry, sick, and tired” include the gender wage gap, the risks of pregnancy and “the immense social expectations of motherhood,” pervasive sexual harassment and assault, and the normalization of pain and discomfort. Add to these the daily, constant stream of microaggressions like being interrupted, talked over, or perceived as less believable than men and the “fundamental bias” that they “are inherently less worth listening to.” Chemaly offers statistics, studies, and convincing stories to justify this rage, but where phenomena like the #MeToo movement and the women’s marches offer examples of turning collective anger into action, she dwells on the denial and backlash that occur when women try to identify or confront the “dense matrix of violence and discrimination” embedded in culture. She encourages women to cultivate “anger competence,” or owning one’s anger, with advice to develop self-awareness and finding a supportive community. Calling for a “wise anger” that can dismantle pervasive sexism and create a fundamentally democratic society, the book makes a persuasive case that angry women can achieve, not vengeance, but change.

August 1, 2018

Award-winning feminist thinker and activist Chemaly's thought-provoking book, based on personal interviews and sociology research, exposes cultural perceptions and stereotypes of the melodramatic, angry woman. Chemaly argues that women are socialized from a young age to "be likeable" and to repress their anger. Because anger, aggression, and assertiveness are linked as one behavior in women and young girls, repression has deleterious consequences on their lives in a wide range of areas. The author documents in great detail what causes women to experience anger--male violence, structural discrimination, daily slights and marginalization, threats to abortion rights, and the overwhelming responsibilities of mothering and caregiving. Such analysis offers a timely, politically charged account of what it means to be an American woman today. The author recaps the development of the Me Too movement, and also explains how the Trump presidency has exacerbated women's anger and propelled women to new levels of activism. VERDICT Rejecting any call for "anger management," Chemaly concludes by recommending ten ways women can develop what she calls "anger competence," so as to harness anger as a tool for change. For feminists, sociologists, and politically involved readers.--Marie M. Mullaney, Caldwell Coll., NJ

Copyright 2018 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

Starred review from August 1, 2018
If men truly understood how angry the women around them are, they'd be speechless, Chemaly writes in her thoughtful, in-depth exploration of female rage. The most notable and frustrating thing about women's anger, Chemaly observes, is how often it's repressed or shut down because women are taught from girlhood that being angry is unattractive, unappealing, and unladylike. These gender stereotypes can be even more challenging for women of color, particularly black and Latina women, who have to contend with being labeled angry on a regular basis. When women do give voice to anger or frustration about their experiences, from bearing the brunt of responsibility for childcare and other tasks deemed in the feminine sphere to dealing with harassment ranging from being catcalled to being physically assaulted, they're often dismissed or their concerns belittled. The examples and statistics Chemaly cites are enough to get one's blood boiling, but, as she notes, anger isn't intrinsically bad so long as it's not repressed. She points out that the 2016 election has spurred many women to seek political office themselves. Chemaly finishes with a helpful list of suggestions for channeling that anger into something positive, including letting go of niceness and trusting other women. An essential and timely read.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2018, American Library Association.)

Starred review from July 15, 2018
The director of the Women's Media Center Speech Project interrogates the nature of modern female anger and outrage.In this powerful essay collection, Chemaly draws on interviews, research, and personal experience to examine why patriarchal Western cultures continue to demand that women silence their rage, much of which is well-earned. From early childhood, girls are taught that expressing anger is taboo; to gain social acceptance, they must learn the lesson of object utility. When the author spoke at a New England college several years ago, she was confronted by a 19-year-old male student who implied that women were "inert, possessions to be used, and lacking in self-determination." Internalized rage, which society encourages women to mask with smiling benevolence, often takes the form of bodily ailments that run the gamut from headaches to depression and fibromyalgia. Chemaly argues that when women express the pain that doctors too often dismiss, they are "actually conveying...that having a female body hurts and endangers us." Regardless of what women may desire and no matter their ambitions, modern society teaches them that their proper role is as caregiver, "despite the stress and economic vulnerability [that role] cultivates." That role receives its ultimate codification in motherhood, which Western culture still sees as a woman's obligation rather than choice. Women who step out of line to assert themselves become targets of what Chemaly calls the corrosive "drip, drip, drip" of microaggressions that ultimately become "the building blocks of structural discrimination" (among countless others, see: Hillary Clinton). The author goes on to assert that much-critiqued worldwide movements like #MeToo are crucial because they offer spaces where women can tell their stories and be heard. To help women use anger productively, Chemaly ends by offering a 10-point plan of action to help redress the gender imbalances that threaten not only them, but democracy itself. Intelligent and keenly observed, this is a bracingly liberating call for the right of women to own their anger and use it to benefit a society "at risk for authoritarianism."Important, timely, necessary reading.

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