How to Breathe While Suffocating

April 8, 2024
Instagrammer Brackett debuts with a candid if occasionally overwrought account of his journey from abuse, addiction, and mental health struggles to self-acceptance. A self-described “crack baby” who was rushed into detox in his first moments on earth, Brackett and his four sisters endured neglect and abuse at the hands of their single mom (“The beatings had a repetitiveness, if nothing else”). While the children found stability with an adoptive family when Brackett was six, bullying from classmates who guessed that he was gay and his own “carnal fantasies” became sources of torture. The book’s whirlwind later chapters recount Brackett’s multiple attempts to run away from his Montana home; stints in Dallas and Oklahoma City, where he assumed false personas; the genesis of his crystal meth addiction and struggles with body dysmorphia; and his halfhearted stints in rehab before he hit rock bottom and was inspired to “do something positive” by spreading mental health awareness on social media. Brackett’s tenacity and willingness to recount the ugly episodes of his life inspire, though the narrative is weighed down by some heavy-handed symbolism, as when he describes the moment he destroyed his crystal meth pipe and torch in an effort to get sober: “I grabbed the rock and began to crush... these tools of demise,” after which it began to rain, “like a cleansing acknowledgement from the heavens.” Still, it’s an affecting ode to the power of perseverance and second chances.